An intimate, often hilarious but always sincere memoir from country legend Ty Herndon on his struggles with addiction, mental health, his career, relationships, and being the first openly gay male country superstar.Ty Herndon may be most known for his beautiful country songs, but behind the music Herndon's own life could be the subject of a classic country ballad. His career began as a member of the band The Tennessee River Boys--the band that would later become Diamond Rio. He found solo success after signing to Epic Records and releasing the number-one hit "What Mattered Most," launching a decades-long career as one of country music's leading legends.But behind the fame, Herndon struggled with addiction, mental health issues, and his sexuality--the latter of which had no place in mainstream country in the 90's, 2000's and arguably through today. Facing a series of setbacks including an arrest, lawsuits and a drug relapse, all while struggling to maintain his secret, his spiral ultimately led to a suicide attempt. His subsequent successful stay in rehab led to the inspiration for his song "God or the Gun."Now, Herndon brings that song to life telling his full story for the first time. With profound introspection, brutal honesty, occasional humor and a lot of heart, Herndon shares how he fought against his demons and ultimately chose God over the gun.