A selection of weird, wild and wacky short stories, that are guaranteed to be free from political correctness, but not traces of tree nuts, peanuts, pineapples, lactose, gluten, and gratuitous sexual inferences. As there is no guarantee that this book has not been printed using machinery that may have been used for the processing of tree nuts and peanuts, or products containing lactose or gluten. The author recommends that readers with allergies of any kind clad themselves in hazmat bodysuits, constructed using non-allergenic materials, and equipped with the appropriate breathing apparatus.