A Two-Act Absurd ComedyWritten in the fever-dream years of 2020-2021, abandoned like a half-finished love letter to sanity, and resurrected after a four-year sabbatical, this play was finally completed in November 2025-older, wiser, and far more dangerous.What unfolds is a tender, unflinching, and gloriously ridiculous portrait of an average middle-class family marooned in small-town suburban America, where the lawns are manicured, the dreams are not, and everyone is just one dinner table argument away from revelation or ruin. It is a comedy of manners, errors, silences, and screams-where the absurd is not exaggerated, merely observed closely.This exposé of modern domestic life has been preemptively nominated for the Booker Prize, the Nobel Prize in Literature, and a Tony Award, with pending blessings from Oprah's Reading List, Jordan Peterson's Reading List, and the New York Times Best Seller List (bureaucracy moves slowly; genius does not)."Leo Tolstoy would have written this-if he were alive today, American, caffeinated, and deeply confused by group texts."- Bernardo Shawshank Redemptio de La Santa Maria, Famous Literary Critic, The New Amsterham Times, December 2025 A contemporary literary comedy for readers and audiences who enjoy sharp dialogue, modern satire, and the comforting realization that no one else knows what they're doing either.In short: a masterpiece about nothing and everything, in two acts, with an intermission long enough to question your life choices.