What if the universe ran on customer service?What if wormholes needed maintenance crews, planets could be evicted for unsightly landscaping, and the apocalypse came with tiered subscription plans?Welcome to the most bureaucratic corner of the cosmos.In this darkly comic collection of ten satirical science fiction stories, the ordinary collides with the absurd: A call center worker fields complaints from species without floors, lungs, or legs.A harried tenant discovers his new roommates shed, buzz, and dissolve furniture.Earth gets a notice from the Interstellar HOA: fines pending, eviction possible.A shopping network accidentally expands into deep space (and sparks a civil war over Snuggies).The apocalypse is rescheduled - if you can find a working fax machine.Blending Douglas Adams-style absurdity, Kafkaesque bureaucracy, and the everyday frustrations of modern life, these stories ask: What happens when the universe puts you on hold?Perfect for readers who enjoy: ✔ Satirical & absurdist science fiction✔ Short, sharp, witty stories✔ Cosmic-scale bureaucracy & customer service nightmares✔ The humor of Terry Pratchett, Kurt Vonnegut, and Douglas Adams File your complaints. Confirm your apocalypse package. And whatever you do-please remain on the line.