I am a 44 year old mother of three disabled children, including autism, tourettes, learning difficulties and a whole bunch more. Caring for them over the course of 17 years (so far) I have had more tears than smiles and by having to deal with impossible challenges along the way it triggered my own mental health issues which I had no option but to deal with. Recently diagnosed myself with ADHD, PTSD (from childhood trauma) and an anxiety disorder my head can be a cruel place to live. I realised my children were not the only ones good at masking their struggles! Writing all my thoughts down in poetry - be it the good, the bad and the ugly has saved me from many a dark day and I have found relief by getting it out of my head. I hope these poems can help others who may encounter the same feelings.