I'm gonna make you a heteronormative offer you can't refuse... It turns out when Cultural Marxists lift up their skirts, there are seventy-two genders under there! Bestselling author A.J. Rice returns with his clever and hilariously unfiltered energy in a new volume that skewers modern culture with equal parts brains and bite. Smart, funny, and unapologetically bold, this is Rice at his very best--provocative, fearless, hilarious--and impossible to put down. Hide the children, because you are about to experience the epic conclusion of the mental illness trilogy! This is not the story of a few crime families rigging poker games with NBA players. No--this is something far more horrific, far more nefarious, and far more destructive to the United States of America. A hidden network, operating in plain sight, pulling cultural strings that spread madness from boardrooms to bathrooms, to classrooms to operating rooms, stealthily reshaping the nation one woke directive at a time. We are not talking about La Cosa Nostra, we are talking about the Trans Mafia. An army of vile, gender confused, three hundred-pound blue-haired soldiers, each led by their very own Bearded Lady as commanding officer. The Bearded Lady is patient zero of a mass hysteria that swept across America and the West in the last decade. And if you think the Bearded Lady started singing after the last election and was shamed out of existence, think again. Americans are, by and large, a tolerant people. But we have our own threshold for pain. Being whatever you want to be is part of the American creed. But trying to make others believe what isn't so is as un-American as it gets. Men cannot "transition" into women, irrespective of how much they feel they are "women" deep inside. If they actually believe they are women--by dint of feeling that they are--then they are mentally ill and to be pitied. But as Rice points out, when the media, sports leagues, academia, Hollywood, and the Democratic Party conspire to sell you lies, it's not compassion they deserve--it's ridicule. Open disdain. Holster your pity, he says, and weaponize your humor to mock them mercilessly. A good working definition of mental illness is the inability to distinguish objective reality from fantasy. It is the test used by the legal system to determine whether a person can be held criminally responsible for their actions. If a person is adjudicated insane, he is remanded to the custody of a psychiatric hospital rather than a prison. The Democratic Party did not learn the lesson of the 2024 election. The American people rejected the Trans Mafia, but the psychiatric hospital remains open for business, while the Bearded Lady continues to hunt for dissenters to whack. There's no substitute for perfectly timed derision--a lesson well established in Rice's first two books, The Woking Dead and The White Privilege Album. Now, once again, Rice unleashes his acerbic wit with that brash, mouthy Philadelphia style, igniting a comedic donnybrook that's equal parts satire and street brawl. The Bearded Lady started this fight--A.J. Rice is here to finish it.